Archive for the ‘Katie Holmes’ Category

Wednesday, September 10th, 2008

Katie Holmes’ Feet

Click To Enlarge Feet

Because she is who she is, rumors will continue to abound about the pixy-ish Katie Holmes. Is she a plant merely to deflect vicious gossip away from her much talked-about hubby Tom Cruise? Remember, it was Cruise who once went on the attack against allegations that gay male wrestlers were his frequent headlock companions. Or is Katie a Rosemary’s Baby-type sacrificial sex shill proffered to Cruise by a seedy love cult? These are very weird times, and who can tell about these sorts of things. On the other hand, the satanic-colored toenail polish only excites the imagination more concerning these and other cockeyed Katie sex stories. Known primarily for her role in TV’s Dawson’s Creek [she auditioned for it via Federal Express, so the story goes], Holmes was born in Toledo. Her father’s an attorney who specializes in divorce, so Katie’s obviously got an exit strategy worked out. In Toledo, Katie attended parochial school, was a cheerleader, a 4.0 student and pledged virginity faithfully until marriage. Holmes got into modeling at the age of 14 and subsequently turned down the lead for Buffy The Vampire Slayer thus saddling audiences interminably with the annoying Sarah Michelle Gellar. Director Ang Lee also liked Holmes’ “perfect amount of innocence” and cast her in one of his movies. Too bad it wasn’t Brokeback Mountain because we’d have had more Cruise jokes to crack. Decked out in  an outfit from the highly exclusive L. Ron Hubbard collection, Katie more than dwarfs the competition in all things fashionable, it would appear. However, a strange lump forms on her right foot, but alien pregnancy rumors have been dogging Katie’s days for a long time. Still we must adhere to standards. Cute or not, a “7″ is a standard issue rating in such instances- that is until we hear from those madcap Scientologists.

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